sometimes it looks like a frog


  Posted May 9th 2006 by PaPa

Frankly, Nintendo's opening couldn't have been much fruitier. If your primary goal in watching this press conference was to see a Japanese man prance about like a hyper-active four year old, then it seems you came to the right place. Fortunately, they quickly move on to release date (end of this year), price (low) and controller functionality (awesome).

A key facet of the Wii controller is supposed to be the immersion, and the newest feature in this vein to be revealed is the speaker in the controller. Using the example of firing your bow in Zelda, you'll hear the sound of the bow string drawing back, then when you release you hear the arrow's flight fading from the controller speaker to the TV speakers. The sword functionality of the Wii controller in this game also looks pretty awesome, and the Wii controller, unlike the PS3 one, has rumble.

Nintendo seem to be trying to build up some kind of bad boy image, talking about it's "disruption" of the market. This was at the start of some DS shit that I really wasn't listening to, other than that they're putting a sequel to Wind Waker on it and that the DS Lite is another cruel betrayal of those people who buy Nintendo products when they come out.

They also completely fail to show any footage of the new Super Smash Bros. What the fuck are you up to, Nintendo? You've held out on price, exact launch date and SSB. What the hell did you think gamers wanted to see? Some random fat guy playing tennis with Nintendo bigwigs? No! That's a bad Nintendo! Naughty puppy!

SLN News – low on facts, high on abuse.

Oh, Sony

  Posted May 9th 2006 by PaPa

Whilst I would stop short of calling myself a Nintendo fanboy, I have to say that I love it when Sony fucks up. £600 (£410) for the PS3, plus the cost of games and extra controllers? What the fuck, Sony, what the fuck? OK, so you're offering the core system for £500 (£340), but the 360 launch taught us that 'core' = 'pile of wank'. When someone can buy both of your competitors' consoles for the price of yours, you might have a bit of a problem.

Of course, when considering the price, you can't forget that the PS3 allows you to play the new blu-ray discs. Unfortunately, Sony's proprietary format has to do battle with HD-DVD, in a re-run of the VHS vs. Betamax wars. Just to remind you, Sony was the one behind Betamax and the Mini Disc, and the Hi-Capacity Mini Disc. Got any of those at home?

The PS3 launches worldwide on November 17th this year. I recommend selling your kidney now, because there's swiftly going to be a glut on the market.

Advantages of Dressing All in Black

  Posted May 8th 2006 by Dae

Occupied the last few days with the unadulterated enjoyment of our newly inherited, and more importantly unbelievably gigantic, television. Barely had the polythene left its angular, no-nonsense exterior however when proof came that when it comes to TV, size can do only so much. Proof called How to Lose a Man in Ten Days. Finding myself desperately tracking Kate Hudson's face, if only to avoid the irresistable urge to chew off Matthew McConaughey's hypothetical balls, I realised that hell has a name, and that it's name is that of director Donald Petrie. I don't know who you are, Donald, but I'm coming to find you, and when I do I'm going to rip out the congealed piss that you call hair.

In any case, I spent an enjoyable Sunday evening looking through some of Fina's pixel work - she's even supplemented my penguinart archive with the lil piece o emo currently exhibiting as my writfo avatar. On the subject of emo, Praccy's got a fucking MySpace, lolol.

Oh, and if you like Jom, you'll love this. Hope you're taking notes, Donald.

Trouble in Paradise

  Posted May 2nd 2006 by Dae

So Doc was like 'lol' and Jom was like 'stfu' and blade was like 'omggg'. Harry seems to think I take it too seriously, and after a contemplative biscuit I found I agreed, albeit grudgingly. In the words of Bob Marley: no woman, no cry.

Register up fast, lest you miss the wild ride that is changing your password. A brief panic sprung up earlier when, while I was adding the Memberlist page, the falcobug emerged. Innocent users were, quite suddenly and with no warning, being logged in as Falco. A scary experience, I can tell you.

I'm just now hearing some promising mutterings from resident artiste Joshwa. I'll say no more lest I spoilerize.

TB out.

Dynamic Like Your Mum

  Posted April 30th 2006 by Dae

Apologies to anyone who's visited the site over the last few days only to be greeted by a string of MySQL errors. SLN's been getting cleverer.

The words you are reading now are no commonplace concatenation of syllables, but summoned as deus ex machina: the portentous offspring of SLN's stillborn inner workings, animated by PHP black magic.

Our user system (independant of the forum) is now in place, featuring the ability to log both in and out. Hopefully within a couple of days there'll be a public profile to edit and the ability to upload certain kinds of content. Coming soonest will be the capacity to change the password the system gives you at registration.

At the risk of this sounding like an Oscar acceptance speech, I'd like to thank the excellent resource, which more than halved the time this took.


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